I love this time of year. Most of the hustle and bustle of Christmas is over; an old year ending and a new beginning just around the corner.
It’s a great time for reflection. A time for re-enforcing the lessons learned in the year gone by so that the year ahead can be even better.
One way to use this reflective time is to separate your thoughts into the various areas of your life. So you might reflect on your health for the year, your finances, your relationships – which you may wish to separate out into different categories such as family, friends, someone special. Then there is education, personal growth, leisure, spiritual growth. You choose what’s important to you in your life.
Also, do add in those areas that you want but haven’t got. One of the areas I love to help my clients with is relationships, particularly ....
... those single clients who have never learned to establish a great relationship with a romantic partner. Do you want to get out there and have fun dating? Do you have other elements of your life that you have not yet fulfilled? Reflect upon what you did not have this year with a view to deciding what you could do to improve the situation next year.
Here are a couple of my reflections to help you on your way:
My Relationships: I am so lucky in that I have wonderful children; both parents still alive and I have a lovely sister too. I have many extended family members - over 50 of us - who meet up once a year for a party in the summer and I have fantastic friends and colleagues. I am blessed and I am grateful.
Do you have difficult relationships? I used to. I spent time wanting people to be the way I wanted them to be and do what I wanted them to do. Then I was dissatisfied when I was “let down”. What a waste … and how arrogant!
I have learned many lessons in my life and I believe the best one is about relationships. Wayne Dyer sums this up in the following quote ...
“Love is the ability and willingness to allow those that you care for to be what they choose for themselves, without any insistence that they satisfy you.”
It takes practice. Even now I sometimes find myself trying to persuade or cajole someone to my point of view because it will satisfy my needs. I usually catch myself out quickly these days and stop dead in my tracks, turning my questioning to how I can help them get what they want, or asking questions to open up their options. This practice is what has created fantastic relationships in my life and long may it continue.
The irony is that NOT pushing for what I want has given me more love, respect, fun and joy than I could ever have imagined, let alone peace of mind and spirit.
My Health: I do have some health challenges. At the beginning of 2007 I had problems with my hip, right thigh, knee and calf. I was in constant pain and I could not walk well. I had been to the doctor many times over the years and told I had ‘bursitis’. I looked up bursitis on the internet and it was a problem that sports people suffered – not inactive therapists who spend their lives sitting down! For years I believed the doctor.
However, last year it reached an intolerable level but I happened upon a wonderful podiatrist (foot specialist) and chiropractor. She had me walk across some pads on the floor that were connected to a computer and all became clear. My problems stemmed from my feet and ran up the whole body from there. I ordered a set of personally tailored orthotics for my shoes and month by month my pain decreased; my ability to exercise, walk normally, climb stairs and even to stand on one leg whilst I put my socks on, all went back to normal. I still have some pain from arthritis which I deal with by using my magnetic bracelet but I’m much more mobile than I was this time last year.
Health lessons for the year ahead: Now that I can do these things, I really must make sure I actually do do them! I help lots of people lose weight every year but, being human, I falter and don’t always follow my own good counsel. I always take supplements which have helped me keep free from coughs and colds for years now. Time to get back to my regime of Juice Plus Complete which helped me lose 1½ stone last spring when I was raising money for our charity, The Brain Research Trust.
What could you do to improve your health this year? What are you tolerating that might benefit from another opinion or another therapy.
I have spent a little time reflecting on each aspect of my life, but the only other element I shall share with you today is in the category “Leisure”.
My last message to you was about what we could learn from the Strictly Come Dancing contestants (see below). I listened to myself for a change and followed my own advice.
I decided last week that learning how to use my camera properly and take great photos was a MUST (point 1 of my previous message). I spent Christmas reading the instructions and then decided to get some help – a teacher (point 3). I have found an adult education course which perfectly fits the bill. Now, step by step, I will learn more about my chosen hobby (point 2).
Is there something you would like to learn or a place you have promised yourself that you would visit, a relationship that needs mending, a health issue that needs resolving or a habit that needs breaking?
- Praise yourself for any efforts you have already made.
- Put behind you any thoughts of past failure – they need not affect your future unless you let them.
- Decide how the lessons you learned in 2007 can make your 2008 a wonderfully fulfilling year.
Enjoy your time of reflection
Bee
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